The Epidemic Keeping Women From Living With Ruthless Integrity

Recently on a podcast I heard author and pastor, Rob Bell, highlight some of his core values in life, one of which saw the hair on my arms stand up in agreement. Two words that felt so at home in my body.

Ruthless Integrity.

To me, ruthless integrity implies living in complete alignment with your values, only acting and speaking in accordance with what feels true to you, and being unashamed to stand behind all that you share with the world. To me it means saying and doing what you mean and ruthlessly being true to your word.

I’m a health and life coach with a big voice driven by insane passion, so naturally I believe that we all have something incredibly unique to share with the world, shaped by our own beliefs, experiences, values and truth. And I’m going to jump right in here and remind you that yes, you have a voice and yes, it’s your duty to ensure your unique voice is heard.

Whether you are a writer, a barista, a mother or an assistant; you are gifted countless opportunities every day to speak, act and behave in a way that feels congruent with who you are and what you stand for. This is the whole purpose behind my She is Fierce program; reconnecting with who you are on a whole new level so you can live it out loud through your words and actions.

Yet I’ve noticed in our society, there seems to be a bit of a slight blockage in the pipes of self-expression, keeping many women from letting out their truth and thus acting from this place of integrity. And as you can imagine, it’s drenched in some serious fear!

Women everywhere, doubting their truth and turning down the volume of their inner voice in fear of saying the wrong thing.

In fear of being proven wrong.

In fear that their past will one day come back to haunt them, should their current beliefs one day no longer be cool, accepted or mainstream.

I see women holding in their perspectives, insights, advice and truth back from the world, in fear of one day being judged. And it saddens me. Because I fear that these women have forgotten what they truly stand for within..

Love. Not fear.

Truth. Not judgement.

Compassion. Not criticism.

Women are giving their power away each and every day to fears that in no way, shape or form align with the other key values in their life..

Freedom. Honesty. Adventure. Independence. Unity.

All of the reasons we love life to begin with. All of the magnificent values that come from expressing who we are to the world with confidence, authenticity and integrity.

I say all of this with absolute empathy; I understand the resistance. I’m well aware of the fact that in 10 years time you may believe in something very different to what you do right now; change is our only constant and our curiosities will no doubt always lead us to learning new things about ourselves and the world that may or may not contradict our current beliefs. We are also human beings, and so mistakes are most certainly going to happen, and there will be times when we fall out of alignment. But I truly believe that if you lead your life with a conscious heart and you are an active participant in your own personal growth and awareness, I believe ruthless integrity is a badge you can wear proudly.

Truth is: We don’t know what we don’t know.

All we have in this moment is our truth, and our eagerness to learn more. That is what makes us seekers. A limitless thirst for knowledge, perspective and insight into a fascinating world filled with wonder and awe. It’s such a beautiful time to be alive. People of any age, background, education level or gender have the ability to express themselves, share what they believe in, speak their truth and through that, connect deeper into who they are and what they stand for. Unique perspectives, ideas and opinions are heard, appreciated and encouraged on every topic under the sun using a multitude of different platforms, and those who feel that inner calling and restlessness, inspired to live life louder and achieve more, have access to everything that they could ever need to show up and communicate their beliefs and desires. We live in a time where anyone can be heard and it’s marvellous!

And it’s with absolute certainty that I can say that one day I will look back on all that I now proudly advocate and believe in and find one or two areas I no longer look at in the same way. I will no doubt have changed my mind a million times since then, and I may even look back at my words and cringe, realising how much I was still yet to learn. But you know what? I welcome that moment!

I welcome that day when I look back at my courageous expeditions of self-expression and relentless belief in what set my soul on fire. Because I will know that I did all of it with ruthless integrity to who I was at the time, taking action and pursuing life in alignment with what I hold dearest to my heart which includes taking risks, always showing up, always letting my spirit be free, and always believing in the good in people. And if such relentless expression of my beliefs and passions should one day see me on the wrong side of a debate or put me in a position of discomfort, I will rest easy knowing that I never swayed from my truth. And my truth is and will always be the only truth that matters to my soul.

So I want to inspire you to take a good look at your own values and beliefs and ask yourself;

Am I living with ruthless integrity?

Am I resisting the expression of my core essence, my truth, my heart - in fear of judgement or being ‘wrong’?

Where in your life can you pull out the cork, open the flood gates, and begin saying what you really mean?

Now is the only time you will ever have for sure, don’t wait a second longer to reveal your truth and stand behind it with pride. You are worthy of a life of ruthless integrity. 

Love Tara x